Design

This male birth control concept blasts your testicles with ultrasound

Cosos is a contraceptive concept that wants to be the terminator of sperm.

I don’t know what to say about this contraceptive device concept that stymies sperm with ultrasound waves. As I’m typing this, the Coso, in all of its novel high-tech glory, is almost literally breaking my brain — I’m both bursting at the seams with puns and balls deep in thought, pontificating about whether this could actually work.

The idea for the Coso, which is the brainchild of designer Rebecca Weiss, is simple (or at least I think it is, since no one is actually well-versed in the scientific aftereffects of dousing your family jewels in ultrasound waves).

To use it, you would simply fill the reservoir up with water, delicately plop your testes into what’s ostensibly a cutting edge bird bath for your balls, and wait a few minutes as the device showers your unsuspecting sperm in ultrasound waves.

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Hypothetically, if science goes according to plan, Coso says the waves would (two weeks after initial usage) effectively put your sperm in timeout, temporarily halting regeneration, and to sweeten the deal, it only takes a few minutes but could be effective for six months.

Let’s be clear: this device is not real yet, it’s a concept designed partially to promote the idea of studying the use of ultrasound waves for contraception, which is so far, a completely untested form of birth control — at least for humans.

Ultrasound contraception has been used successfully on animals, dogs for example, so it’s not completely asinine from a science standpoint, though before Coso can start hawking these nifty little high-tech ball baths, they’ll need to do some serious clinical research.

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And as jarring as the concept may seem, it might not be any more risky than ingesting hormonal birth control, which in the longterm, has been linked to increased cancer rates among women.

Personally, I’m ready for a future in which men bear some of the burden of using non-condom contraception, and if all that means is taking a warm dip (so to speak) once every six months, then why not buy a Coso and go nuts.