James Pero

Reviews

G-Fuel's chili dog flavored Sanic drink rattled me to the core

Making an actual chili dog smoothie might seriously be more palatable than drinking this meme dust.

G-Fuel's Sanic-themed energy powder that tastes like chili dogs. Food. Drink. Video games. Gaming. M...

Chili dogs are great. That’s not an opinion, that’s just an inherent human truth like hating airlines or loving Tom Hanks. It’s also the reason why G-Fuel’s Sanic-themed “Chili Dogs” flavored energy powder is an affront to civilized society as we know it.

Let me explain: earlier this year, G-Fuel, a manufacturer of energy powders marketed towards masochists in the e-sports community, announced that it would be making a granulated drink mix branded with one of the most recognizable gaming memes ever...

Sanic

Naturally, upon seeing the announcement, things escalated quickly among Input editors from, “wow that sounds disgusting” to “we absolutely need to try this” so against our better judgment we pre-ordered G-Fuel’s Sanic-themed drink bundle and waited. A few months later we were informed that our shipment was on the way.

Unfortunately, like some kind of meatball-shaped angel of death, the Sanic juice did indeed arrive at my doorstep ready to flood my body with the joys of late capitalism meme marketing. Here’s the unopened box in all of its Sanic glory.

G-Fuel’s Sanic bundle came with a few things: a tub of chili dog flavored energy powder (duh), another tub of “Peach Rings” flavored powder, and perhaps my favorite addition — this Sanic-emblazoned mixing cup.

Input’s very own Ryan Houlihan and a brave and misguided soul like myself decided to tag along for a taste test, or as the French like to call it, “abusing your body.” A fair warning: what you’re about to see, will likely shock you or at least make you chuckle in that schadenfreude kind of way you get from watching people getting hurt on YouTube.

Mmm, ring flavored

This is what the chili dog powder looks like

Ryan, what do you think about the nose on this vintage? 🔊sound on 🔊

Let’s watch that again in slow-mo

“It smells like Six Flags where all the booth smells come together and a ride is broken down.”

Ryan Houlihan, Input Senior Gaming Editor

San Francisco Chronicle/Hearst Newspapers via Getty Images/Hearst Newspapers/Getty Images

💀 This is what it looks like all mixed up 💀

After mixing up this chemical cocktail (which, by the way, does not contain any meat!), there was only one thing left to do...

Bottoms up

🔊sound on 🔊

“More metaphorically, it tastes like late capitalism.”

James Pero, Input's Card Story Editor

Shutterstock

Ryan, what do you think?

🔊sound on 🔊

In case you were wondering, this is what the leftover chili dog juice looks like in the bottom of a cup

Next up: Peach Rings

Not a lot of extreme reactions here. The Peach Rings flavor powder tastes like sugar! It’s peachy, it’s orange, it’s well above the threshold that most people would consider to be pleasantly sweet, but most importantly it doesn’t take like a plastic Slim Jim.

Am I surprised that G-Fuel’s “Chili Dogs” powder tastes about as good as a shoe made out of meatloaf and asbestos? Not entirely, but to experience that type of monstrosity firsthand is still pretty jarring — and I’ve eaten leftover Arby’s.

I guess I did feel a little energized after consuming G-Fuel’s Sanic-themed science experiments, but technically speaking, punching myself in the face gets the blood going too, and that’s not something I’d highly recommend.

My personal take? If you absolutely have got to go fast, take a breath, brew a pot of coffee, and skip the perils of meme-based energy powders. G-fuel will be remiss, but your internal organs will thank you later.

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