“Nike shorts” has repeatedly become a trending topic on Twitter this spring, signaling excitement for a semi-post-COVID summer. Champions of the Swoosh-branded shorts can essentially be sorted into two categories: dudes who plan on wearing nothing but, and women who think they look sexy on men and may just steal them as a sort of thottie trophy.
Whether you’re a dude who favors uniform dressing or a sex-positive gal, you really can’t go wrong with Nike shorts. They’ve become shorthand for a warm-weather release because they’re relatively cheap, versatile, and above all comfortable. And in our logo-crazed world, few insignias carry more cache than the couch.
To help you live your best summer life as espoused by Twitter, we’ve put together a range of shorts that you can pick up right now to get the good times started. Sure, they may be stolen — but that’s a risk you’re just going to have to take. (Or maybe you already need a replacement.)
Nike Flow Leg Embroidered Shorts ($45)
You can’t get more classic than this — black fabric, white logo, and the perfect five-inch inseam.
Nike Dri-Fit Flex Stride Shorts ($60)
If you dare to go even shorter, your risk will pay off in these colorful trail running shorts. Access is exclusive to Nike members right now, but all you need to do is sign up to maximize your thigh exposure.
Nike x Kim Jones Allover Print Shorts ($90)
Some people still ain’t ready to go high above the knee with their shorts, and that’s alright. Kim Jones Air Max 95-inspired subtle striping makes these basketball joints far from dumpy.
Nike Dri-Fit Elite Basketball Shorts ($45)
Dri-Fit Elite basketball shorts are a mainstay for hoopers, but they’re just as great for lounging. And if you wear a small, medium, or large you can pick up a black-on-black pair for just $38.
Nike Yoga Dri-Fit Shorts ($55)
While all of the shorts here are comfy, you’re not going to top ones made specifically for the full range of motion required for yoga. The sweat-wicking fiber is made from 75-percent recycled polyester, giving the shorts sustainability points, too.
Nike Sportswear Club Fleece Shorts ($35)
Fleece-back shorts are a revelation, and Nike made these specifically for those days off from activity. Another tip: gray sweats do a magical thing for your anatomy.
Nike Green Woven Shorts ($50)
Mean green: great for standing out in a crowd and not getting hit by a car.
Nike ACG Nylon Shorts ($50)
If you come here regularly, you know we’ve gotta throw some All Conditions Gear in. This particular belted short with a vivid pattern is sold out almost everywhere — but you can still get it here in a nearly full-size run.
Nike Heritage Cord Short ($65)
Corduroy shorts? They’re not as hot as you’d think. Smarter material and old school Nike logo in lower case put these a cut above your standard athletic short.
Nike Flex Stride Wild Run Shorts ($60)
We can’t promise you faster times, but you will look like the fastest person out wherever you take your runs.